Ive only had 3 hours of sleep last night, have done a spin class, been to the postoffice in town, and basketball training... Im wide awake... and I think I know why...
Ive got too many things going through this head of mine..
On the top of that list, someone... Ive said my good-byes but yet, each time I see the email saying, "It's any time now..." I feel my heart stop beating for that one second... How do you prepare yourself for the inevitable, how do you prepare your emotions and heart knowing what is coming... or the lack of it... I wanna let it all out, but I always seem to find myself staring into space, that last few moments I had, playing over and over again like a broken projector... I would give anything in the world to be there.. and being this far away somehow makes it harder.. Im always away.. Im never there... How do you let go... someone, anyone...???
Spoke to my Mom and Dad about an important decision I have to make.. and Im not sure if Im making the right choice... my heart saying Im not, but my brain is saying I am..
Do I go with the heart or the brain....???
I just hope I'll keep it together when the time actually comes... I cant start to imagine what it'll be like...
and I dont want to start....
